there are monsters in small places 9

The old man with a twisted hand had worked in the lighthouse since he was twenty-three and his hand was not twisted. He had not been twenty-three for quite some time and his left hand had been straight and untwisted for most of his life, but he would still always be known as the old man with the twisted hand. His left thumb had been twisted to the other side of his hand when a sixty-foot sea snake crushed it on the lip of its cave. Everyone in Brightview knew about the snake, but few had ever seen it, and the old man with a twisted hand was one of those few.

The way he tells it, he was just standing around, minding his own damn business. When out of nowhere comes this giant, well I thought it was a sea monster, a basilisk or somethin’ but it’s got no fangs. I was just leaning against the edge of this cave. Like this, see. He leans against his mantle to show you how he was leaning. And this thing, well it was only ‘bout ten feet away, and that’s shorter than it is long, mind you. I can see it’s heading somewhere cause it’s big head’s moving up and down the beach like it’s lost somethin’ precious. He juts out his chin and scans his audience from one side to the other to show you exactly how that big ol’ snake looked up and down the beach. And it don’t even look at me twice before it’s barreling straight towards me.

This is always where the old man with the twisted hand pauses to sip his drink, usually some type of whiskey with the label scraped off for the benefit of the kids who come to see him. This is where he fixes you with colorless eyes as tight as he can.

Now if you think that just ‘cause it’s a snake means it’s slow, then you’d be dead wrong. And if you think you’d have time to get out of its way, then you’d be dead. And he doesn’t have to raise his left hand to show you that that’s true.

there are monsters in small places 8

The next thing Ezrah noticed when he mounted Deadman’s Boulder for the first time was that the sirens were terrifying. Their sharp teeth were unnaturally pointed. Their impossibly round eyes always seemed to be accusing you of something. Their silver fins were the only thing beautiful about them. Yes, the sirens were terrifying, but the sirens were also silent.

Ros was not looking at Ezrah. In fact, Ros was not moving. Six siren eyes tracked Ezrah without saying a word. It made him uncomfortable and he wanted to tell them to mind their own business, but he didn’t think they would listen. They slapped their fins idly on their end of the rock only six feet away. They almost looked like women, but the curves that would determine that were lost in scales and disfigured by spines. Ezrah remembered stories about the way siren songs would convince sailors that it was alright to jump off the back of their ship and felt naked coming up here without wax to stuff in his ears. But although the sirens’ mouths are open, no sound comes out.

“Why aren’t they singing?” he asks. Ros’s lips squirm around themselves until they land with the bottom one thrust out below the top.

“They’re listening.” And the thing Ezrah had not noticed about the sirens was that their heads were tilted to one side and their chins were bobbing up and down in six individual nods. They did indeed seem to be listening. Ezrah tried not to look at the sirens again.

“Why don’t you come down?” he asked Ros, “we could go to that cave and we could-“

“No,” Ros said. The sirens watched silently. Some had moved their heads back to indicate their disapproval while some had tilted their necks more to see if Ros was still okay. Ezrah was trying not to look at the sirens.

“But Ros there’s some great-“

“No,” she repeated, “I’m never coming down again.”

“Ros,” Ezrah started, “what’s going on?” Ros was trying not to look at anything. “Ros,” Ezrah raised his voice. “Answer me, please.” Her hands wrapped tightly around her shoulders.

“I don’t want to go down.” But Ezrah would not give up on his plans to explore the cave only half a mile down the beach.

“But the cave is so cool. They say it’s got-“ Ros closed her eyes tightly.

“I’m never going in that cave again.” Her hands wrapped tighter around the sleeves of her shirt to keep them from sliding off her shoulders.

there are monsters in small places 7

Ezrah noticed the sirens’ teeth first. They were sharp enough to dig through flesh like Evander’s fingernails did when he didn’t cut them. Don’t tell Mom. He would always say. Don’t tell Dad or I’ll kill you. Evander liked to skin seagulls back by the old blue shed when he found them, but that wasn’t the only thing that happened in that shed.

He liked to take girls there since he was thirteen and older and cooler than the middle school girls of Brightview. He led them to the shed by the hand and pretended to be sweet. He was good pretending to be sweet. So good that that’s what everyone thought he was. Only Ezrah knew that he skinned seagulls back by the old blue shed. Only Ezrah knew about the girls.

“You know you can’t have a playdate tonight, sweetie,” Mom said. “It’s a school night.” Ezrah pouted. “B-but Lucy said there’s be shooting stars on the beach but we have to go tonight because they’ll all be gone tomorrow.

…

“Why does Evander get to have so many playdates on school nights and I don’t?!” he whined. Evander’s lips sharpened like a blade and froze – it was less than a second, but that was all Ezrah needed to sense the danger. He broke into indulgent laughter.

“What are you talking about, Ezrah?” But Evander did not laugh that night when he stopped Ezrah from climbing into bed by wrapping his hand around his brother’s wrist. His fingernails were like knives.

“Don’t say anything to Mom and Dad about the shed.”

Ezrah tried to squirm away.

“Did you hear me? Don’t say a word.

Ezrah tried to pull Evander’s hand off. He found his other arm pinned to the bed.

“You say one word and I’ll take you behind the shed and skin you, got it?”

Ezrah closed his eyes.

“You got that? Now promise, promise you won’t say a word.” Ezrah promised.

hanselman’s school of magic 1

Prologue pt. 2

Every member of the high council was subdued when the joined to discuss.

Hanselman started the conversation with a small, sad smile.

“So, what do we do with our small magician?”

“She’s strong; she needs to be close to us,” Mage Cicero started.

“She needs a family,” Mage Maclean added.

“She killed her last family,” Cicero responded, sad, not combative.

“She’s only seven,” Maclean answered softly.

“Maclean is right,” Sesling interjected, his voice matching the somber mood of the room. “She needs someone to look after her, but I’m afraid it can’t be just anyone. She’s dangerous and she’s scared.”

“She doesn’t look it,” Cicero commented.

“But do not doubt that she is,” Sesling replied. Hanselman looked down at his desk where the water in his glass moved in waves he created in concentration. He looked up to fill the silent room with his decision.

“Mage Maclean, you should be the girl’s guardian.” Maclean pulled back.

“I know nothing of raising children,” he protested.

“But you know much of caring for people. The child needs a mage to watch her.”

Maclean nodded slowly, aware of the incredible weight of his decision.

“You cannot teach her,” Mage Sesling addressed. Mage Maclean tilted his head in question. “It is a conflict of interest: one wants her to learn, the other wants her safe.”

“It shouldn’t be,” Maclean answered.

“But you know that it is. I will teach the girl.” And Mage Sebastian Sesling left without another word. Mage Maclean was the last to leave the room.

The girl, Sandry, was standing outside as still as she had stood among the remains of her family and the three unlucky bandits. Her lips were pressed tight in what Maclean knew to be worry. She looked at him expectantly.

“Hi, Sandry,” he smiled. “I will be you guardian.” She responded with an
underdeveloped but genuine smile.

“Mage Maclean?” she asked.

“Michael,” he corrected. “Call me Michael,” he requested as he took her hand and led her gently away from her past.

hanselman’s school of magic 0

Prologue pt 1 – Black Fingers

The esteemed Mage Hanselman noticed a signal assert itself on his charmed map seven years later than he had expected it to appear. There was clearly no time to be spared. He gathered his high council with no explanation, and the two young mages and two old traveled to a nearly uninhabited area of Norway. Mage Hanselman led them to a small house, barely visible under the snow. None, not even Hanselman himself knew what to expect, and none were prepared for what they would find.

Normally when confronted with the sight that met these Mages, one would expect a smell, but the smell had frozen away. Mage Sebastian Sesling was the first to investigate. He rolled over a severed head with his foot.

“There must be quite a story behind this,” he remarked. Mage Maclean pointed past the older Mage.

“Maybe she can tell us.” His voice was no more than a strangled whisper, for what the others had failed to notice until this moment was a girl standing, alive, among seven frozen bodies, one without its head. Mage Hanselman was the first to approach the girl.

Mage Maclean struggled with his stomach and his conscience, each telling him different and completely opposing courses of action. Mage Sesling studied his surroundings, picking things up and moving them around judiciously. Mage Cicero stood stock still, staring only at
the girl. Hanselman knelt next to the girl, successfully ignoring the arm with dead black fingers reaching out behind him.

“What is your name?” he asked softly. A normal seven-year-old might be screaming or crying or running or in fact be doing anything, showing any expression on her face. This girl showed none. This girl did nothing.

“Sandry,” she answered in a flat voice, her eyes falling nowhere, not on the bodies around her and not on Hanselman himself. Hanselman continued as softly as he began.

“What happened, Sandry?” The expression on Sandry’s face was unexpected and alarming to all but Sesling, who seemed more interested in the carnage than the girl. To Hanselman’s inquiry she showed only anger.

“I hurt them. All of them.” Maclean, watching the girl carefully, saw for a moment only an expression of pure agony, quickly replaced by anger, then, nothing. He glanced at Hanselman to see if he had glimpsed the same, but Hanselman would look nowhere but at the girl.

“Will you come with us, Sandry?” he asked. Maclean expected a wisecrack from Sesling about the girl’s lack of choice in the matter, but Sesling, who was watching Sandry in an uncharacteristically serious way, said nothing. “We can teach you not to hurt people. If that’s what you want.”

It was impossible to tell where she looked, if she looked anywhere at all as she considered, or seemed to consider Hanselman’s offer. After a few long moments, she nodded slowly and sullenly. Mage Maclean, still fighting the battle between his stomach and his heart, led the way out and Sandry began to follow, but as she crossed the threshold, Mage Sebastian Sesling leaned down and pulled a small, round ordinary-looking rock from the frozen-solid ground outside the door and held it out to Sandry.

“Never forget where you came from, girl,” he advised. She looked at him for a few long seconds and took the stone, sliding it into her pocket. But she never looked back as she left behind the only home she had ever known.

quarantine 5

Neal could not say that it got easier. In fact, if you had asked him that Friday morning, he would tell you that it had gotten harder because now he was asked, ordered really, to join in. His boots were not as hungry as Acardi’s and he didn’t smile at blood like Mycha, but he had done his share of handcuffing, holding down, and trying desperately to steel his nerves.

He felt alone in his struggle against his conscience. It seemed every other guard was able to silence or even kill what he had been wrestling with since the moment he passed through this godforsaken gate. But it was Friday. They would free the fox today. He took small solace in that, but it wasn’t enough to stop the feeling that started as a small knot in his stomach and now had taken over his heart and his neck. That feeling was his to suffer alone.

quarantine 4

The Resistance, as it was so originally called, had started in the depths of this very compound with the few shapeshifters who roamed freely and the guards whose consciences ate away at their sleep. Viktor Nicklaus Hartmann had been a part of the organization since its inception, and it so happened that he was one of the guards whose conscience ate at his sleep. His conscience was a little less hungry these days, but it still nibbled at him sometimes.

The Resistance was so small and so secret that its resistance often went unnoticed. Viktor’s goal was not a revolution, but simply, as the name implied, resistance. His focus was on getting as many of these shapeshifters out as possible. He had connections on the mainland and many of them involved shifters he himself had freed. 

When he was thirteen, the government had decided that the large population of shapeshifters was not, as many had thought, a blessing or a gift from the gods, but a threat. Viktor had already started security school when they started Collection, as they called it, but if he had started any later, Viktor might not have started at all. As it was, he was now an accomplice of what he knew would one day be a crime against humanity; he was an accessory. To other guards his night-work would be unthinkable. To Viktor Nicklaus Hartmann it was unquestionable. 

It was this that he explained to Neal Grover, the new recruit. The boy seemed less scared afterwards. 

Still there was not much time; there was a new subject to extract, and the Resistance needed this Neal Grover. But he needed to be on board. Viktor walked out to where Neal stood in the empty space between the table and the door. He pulled a small pocketknife out of his pocket.

“Are you prepared to swear in?” he asked. The boy looked slightly apprehensive, but there was no time for that. The boy was what they needed. He would swear in. Viktor sliced his own palm first, where it had been cut many times before, once for each new member. He held out his other hand for Neal’s. Neal hesitantly held out his hand. Viktor wasted no time. He grabbed the boy’s wrist, sliced the palm, and offered his hand. They shook, one time curtly and firmly, and Neal had joined the Resistance. Acardi offered him a Band-Aid, which he gratefully accepted, but Viktor let his cut bleed. 

He folded his hands together and once more commanded the room. 

“Now,” he started, “we have plans to finalize.” He spread out a few ink-stained pages that were sitting on the table. “We must prepare for the immediate extraction of the subject know as Vulpes macrotis, the kit fox.” Neal opened his mouth and looked at Acardi questioningly. Was that the girl from earlier? Acardi nodded. Neal looked back at Viktor. “The full extraction, regretfully, can not be immediate, but we should be able to bring her to a secure location in the compound. Grover, Acardi, you will be taking the afternoon off that day. 

“Grover, your job is to bring the subject to the secure location and conduct the pre-extraction interview and lead the subject to the extraction location where Acardi will be ready with the car. Norv will show Grover the secure location where we’ll keep the subject. 

“As soon as they notice that she’s missing, they’ll sweep the compound, find nothing, and send out as search party. Once they do that, Grover, you’ll get a signal. I’ll page for you to come to my office. It’s close to the overseer’s but not too close. You’ll bring the girl in handcuffs, but explain to her that you’re there to help. Gods know, she’s gone through enough in the past week; she doesn’t need to suffer any more.” 

Viktor bit his lip and looked down at the table. And in that moment, Neal didn’t see Viktor Nicklaus Hartmann, fearless leader of the Resistance, he saw an older brother, a cousin, maybe an uncle; he saw someone who cared. Viktor shook off that moment an instant later.

“In my office she’ll change into respectable civilian clothes. From then on she’s your cousin, picking you and Acardi up for a family reunion. Extraction happens in two days, Grover, on a Friday. Be ready.” He stuck out his still bloody hand. “Can I count on you?”

“Yes, sir,” Neal answered. Viktor laughed.

“I like the green ones. They’re always so formal. That’s all for tonight. Dismissed.” And the group scattered through vents, doors, and ladders. The Resistance would meet again soon.

pipe bomb dream 9

Cal’s driving. The music is loud. More than 17. Loud enough to drown out emotions. Silas leans back in the passenger seat.

“Are there parts of the self that aren’t real?” He asks. She shakes her head.

“Nope it’s all real,” she says.

“Even the parts you regret?”

“Especially.”

“So when people say ‘I wasn’t myself?’”

“Bullshit.”

He taps his fingers on the arm of the seat. She looks out the window. The road is smooth and black.

“Abby says I should go see her in the hospital,” Cal says. Silas looks out the window. The trees are lit. Ready for Christmas. The side of her face is shaded black and white.

“Is she pressing charges?”

Cal shrugs.

“Said on the news she’d make me pay.”

The radio blares. Oh, don’t give us none of your aggravation. We had it with your discipline.

“Three in 10 minutes,” Silas says.

“What?’

“That’s how often people lie.”

“Bet no one likes to hear that.”

“Yeah, no one does,” he says

The radio blares. Well they’re packed pretty tight in here tonight. I’m looking for a dolly who’ll see me right.

“I should probably thank you,” he says.

“You probably shouldn’t.”

The radio blares. I may use a little muscle to get what I need. I may sink a little drink and shout out she’s with me.

“Where are we going?” he asks.

Cal shrugs

“Bowling or something?”

“Sure. Sounds good.”

The radio blares. Saturdays night’s alright for fighting. Get a little action in

pipe bomb dream 8

“Who’s breaking?” Abby asks. Cal leans over to take the shot. The pool balls shatter.

The TV buzzes. “…says he does NOT use racial remarks and comments on oil prices…”

“Look, another one” Cal remarks.

“Another what?”

“Another destroyed person.”

“Destroyed?”

“Destroyed.”

Abby does not respond.

“You can’t do things like that, Cal.”

“You hear Sam’s with Lizzie now?”

“Cal, you hear me? It’s not ok.”

“I didn’t even know they were friends.”

The TV buzzes “…break-in at a charity shop has put a damper on the holiday spirit…”

“Do you think existence is cohesive?” Cal asks.

“What? I don’t know,“ Abby says.

“Then why do people always want it to be? Everyone’s always trying to make everything fit together, and it doesn’t belong.”

“She’s doing okay. In case you’re wondering,” Abby says.

“Your turn.”

“Cal, you should visit her.”

“Watch out for the 8 ball.”

“Cal.”

“You’ll have to deflect it.”

“Cal!”

Cal does not respond.

The TV buzzes “…local girl in the hospital today after an altercation at her college. We were unable to reach the school for comment.”

“Ever think about how easy it is to break your toes?” Cal asks. “They’re so fragile. I don’t know why I haven’t broken one at this point.” She sinks a yellow. “I thought I broke one once. I tripped over a ladder and thought, this is it. But it wasn’t. The little toothpick was perfectly fine.”

“Cal,” Abby interjects, “why did you do it?”

“You ever run on a treadmill?”

“I guess.”

“Doesn’t it make you want to punch something?”

The TV buzzes “…have received suspicious looking packages confirmed to be pipe bombs…”

“You know, I almost asked Sam out,” Cal says. “He was into me, too. Would have said yes.” She sinks a yellow. “He’ll find the one now that he’s over me. That’s just how it goes”

“Come on, Cal, why?”

“You’re snookered.”

“Why?”

“Good luck making that shot.”

“Why?!”

“I have anger issues.” Abby is silent. “That’s what you want me to say, right?” Cal sinks a yellow. “It’s probably true.”

The TV buzzes “…a dog becomes a local celebrity this week when he started skateboarding for charity.”

“In all of time, we only experience a few moments, a blink of the eye,” Cal says.

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“It sucks, that’s what.”

“Look, Cal, I get it―”

“That’s bullshit.”

“What?”

“You spent the whole game asking me why. Now you say you get it.”

“No, Cal, I―”

“At least be consistent.”

The TV buzzes “…local police confirmed the assailant is another young woman from the same college…”

“Cal?”

“Your turn.”

“Cal?”

“You want to hit it soft so you don’t foul.”

“Cal.” Cal pots the 8-ball.

“It felt good.”

“What?”

She sets the balls up in a neat triangular pattern. “It felt good, Abby. That’s why I didn’t stop.”

“Shit, Cal, she’s in the hospital.”

Cal straightens up.

“Who’s breaking?”

pipe bomb dream 7

Cal is sitting with Abby. Talking about who’s with who. About the mating rituals. The animal rutting.

“She’s way out of his league,” Cal says. The girl has long blond hair, an objectively pretty face. He is already balding.

“Maybe he’s nice?” Abby says. Cal laughs. She sees Abby’s pale arms.

“Come on,” her friend defends. “It’s not so hard to believe.”

“Not for you,” Cal says. She sees red. She sees animal rutting. She sees Abby in the sheets. “And that’s fine.” Abby shrugs.

“Hey, look who it is!” She doesn’t look. Her other friend does.

“Oh my god. That guy got so drunk last night. He went home with some random person.”

Cal looks up. His eyes are bright blue. She walks away from her friends. He has a red solo cup.

She takes it. He looks down.

“They like to talk,” she says.

“Yeah…I know,” Silas says. They are standing close. Someone else walks up.

“This your next one?” she asks Silas. She doesn’t look at Cal.

“What?” he says.

“Can’t help yourself, can you? Two dates and onto the next shiny thing.”

He steps back. Eyebrows pulled together. Hurt.

“How did you…?”

“She told me,” the girl says. “She told me how you’re good for nothing but a quick fuck. And not even a good one at that.”

“I-I…” His voice is pitched. Close to breaking.

“What,” she smirks, “you’re gonna cry now?” But she is talking to Cal who is between them now.

“You were saying something?” Cal says. Her voice is soft. Dangerous. Animal rage.

The girl never answers. It turns out. Cal’s fists move against her face, and she falls down. Blood patterns her face as the fists move against her face. She is on the floor. Supine. Helpless.

Supine. Helpless. Red.